Through the month of December, I am offering Affirmations and Tips in preparation for the New Year. Rather than making a New Year’s Resolution on New Year’s Day that quickly falls by the wayside, consider a different approach this year.
December’s Affirmations and Tips provide an opportunity for you to reflect on the shifts and changes you’d like to make which will lead you to the experiences you would like to have in 2019, the way you would like to be in 2019, and the way you would like to feel in 2019.
I become clear on the direction I would like my relationships and my life to go.
In my mind’s eye, I have a positive vision for the potential of my relationships and my life. I focus on what I want to experience, rather than complaining about what I don’t want or don’t like. This orientates me, and others, in the direction I want to go rather than staying stuck in a struggle. As I imagine happy, rewarding experiences, the necessary steps begin to reveal themselves. I am then able to articulate clear requests that advocate for my needs and move my relationships forward in productive ways.
Tip: Establish and communicate what you want in specific, measurable, and positive ways. This will provide direction for you and those around you. For instance, if you want to have more fun in 2019 with your partner, an example of a specific, measurable, positive direction would be to state that you want to take two weekend road trips to a destination you have never seen before. This would be in contrast to saying, I don’t want us to be homebodies and stuck in the same routine this year.
Pointing in the right direction, instead of complaining, can be applied to multiple situations. Simply remember that complaining is negative and does not point in the right direction.
Think about how I might give driving directions to someone coming to my office. It would be ridiculous to tell them, “don’t head west on highway 58, don’t turn left when you get to Washington Street and don’t even bother looking for my building on the right side of the street.” While you might be able to find my office with these instructions, it is a lot more challenging than if I told you how to get there in positive terms. Utilize a similar approach when communicating in your relationships and advocating for your needs and wants.
Review the values you identified last week and add to your list the things you would really like to experience in 2019. Add positive, specific, and measurable ideas about what it would take for you to experience your desires.
©2018 Laura Aube
Imago Relationship Therapy
Imago Relationship Therapy provides you and your partner the experience of healthy communication. In a private couples or family Imago Therapy session, you receive expert guidance and practice using tools like curiosity, listening, receptivity, and understanding.
I would be honored to help you on your journey of living from your true self and creating relaxed, joyful relationships. To learn more or schedule a session, call (816) 359-1885 or email firstname.lastname@example.org.
Laura Aube, LPC, ATR-BC, Certified Imago Therapist
Address: 207 South Washington Street, Raymore, MO 64083
Laura Aube is a licensed Counselor in the State of Missouri. She has advanced training as a Certified Imago Relationship Therapist, as well as a fully-credentialed Art Therapist. Laura has twenty-five years of experience as a therapist and specialized expertise in grief, trauma, couples, and family therapy.